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Accepting Candidates We Don't Like is Similar to the Classic Grieving Process

People get emotional during elections. They pick candidates and pronounce how angry they’ll be if their candidate doesn’t win. These days people like Barack Obama are literally demonized. Still there are stages people go through when something new and strange happens to them, something like the death and dying of Elizabeth Kubler-Ross who examined these stages and wrote about them. These stages include shock, denial, bargaining, until the person comes to accept what has happened and moves on. This has happened with both the Sarah Palin and Barack Obama candidacies. There are some who accept what has happened,, some still surprised and some who deny what’s happened and still believe that by some miracle the person they don’t want on the ticket will disappear altogether, decide not to run or be taken off the ticket for one of a number of reasons..

When John McCain announced Sarah Palin as his Vice Presidential pick, that indeed was a surprise because pundits believed he would nominate Mitt Romney, yes. Mike Huckabee, maybe. There were a number of Republican candidates, who were mostly Governors, were waiting in the wings. There were plenty of people who talked about what McCain should do, might do, and could do; but no one had considered that John McCain would choose some relatively unknown Governor of Alaska, and a woman to boot. This was indeed shocking, not just to Republicans but for voters everywhere.

So the shock came, then the disbelief. Then there were estimates about how long Palin might remain on the ticket. Other people were angry in their bargaining. Some accepted it and went on to do what they needed to do to support or not support the candidacy. Like any type of difficult news, like death or disability, folks came to the realization in stages. That is, those against McCain's pick. Because for others the candidacy was no more than a continuation of a philosophy and plan that they would have approved. So it wasn't like finding out about dying but about the revival of a spirit that seemed lost.

There are Republicans who can’t conceive of a Democrat in the White House who doesn’t give the image that they have grown up with for President. They see Obama as strange, so many of them were stirred by irrational, unfounded emails that circled the next asking the question, “who is Obama,” a question still being played to the befuddled in Florida and other areas of the country, whipped into extreme passions by John McCain’s asking the question and Sarah Palin claiming Obama is a traitor. These people are undergoing those same stages in the same convulsive way.

All of this is being played out on national television, and we see the stages of acceptance at their most dramatic pitch. Elizabeth Kubler-Ross would reflect on this and perhaps see the parallels.

She would counsel us, however, to move on into the stage of acceptance, no matter what our political positions might be, so that we can begin all over to bring about what will likely come in our favor at another time and place.

About the Author

Professional journalist with small town newspaper with hard copy and online editions and political and social blog. Licensed also as a mental health counselor, certified as a teacher, and experience over 40 years in multiple areas. See website at http://www.therealviews.com and http://www.thehouseofaloha.com/Books.html where her book on the secret life of Sarah Palin is listed and blogs at http://everythingsarahpalin.blogspot.com or http://coffeewithcarol.blogspot.com

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